Oberlin Blogs

The Mystery

March 30, 2012

Ruby Turok-Squire ’16

Seeing as it's spring break, I thought I'd try to get some clean clothes together. It's got to that point where I really, really can't put it off any longer.


 

Hmm, is this what's supposed to happen?

No, definitely not. Where are my clothes??

There they are!

What went wrong? Did I use bubble-bath? Should I sue 'Tide'? If you can solve the mystery, I would love to know.

Notice the lovely Kahn Hall washing machines - everything's lovely and clean and spiffing in this dorm. Only problem is, I'm really spoiled now and when we get kicked out next year into other dorms I'll be like, where's my private bathroom?!

I thought I'd try my physics textbook for some advice. Surely, it would have something to say on the matter - how the world works, and all that. So I had a skim through and came up with:

He looks - well, just as confused as me. Love the moustache!

 

Great! I really want to try that some day. But still no insight on exploding washing machines. Oh dear, where is this liberal arts thing taking me? I may know how many types of microphones there are in the world, but I can't actually dress myself! Guess the laundry's coming home with me.

So whenever you're feeling a bit like you can't do anything, just take a look at this:

I grabbed my clothes and ran in shame back to Canada. Actually, I galloped here on a moose, so it took me a few days, but the clothes dried out nicely in the breeze.

I thought I missed having a cinema in Oberlin, but now that I'm back in a town that has one, I just want it to go away! Every film seems to be exactly the same, and mind-numbingly bad. Time for a rant. (I'm English and seem unable to contradict the stereotype today.)

Here's the biggest mystery of all: The Hunger Games. What a disgusting excuse for a brand. People say it's making some great socio-political statement, but I say that's just how they try to justify their enjoyment of such a sick idea. It's children murdering children - in graphic detail! Why?! If you want a real story in this genre, read Lord of the Flies, Brave New World (my fave), Cuckoo's Nest - you get the idea. The Hunger Games is entirely different, because it's full of gratuitous violence. I cannot believe that anyone would enjoy this, let alone twelve-year-olds! God knows how desensitized they must be. Well, each to their own...if you enjoy five word sentences, read the book, and if you enjoy forgetting all morality, see the movie. But I walked out.

End of rant. And on that note, thank goodness Oberlin is an anomaly in the USA. It's the only reason I can live here!

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