I used to think home was somewhere you returned to. This summer, I realized it could also be somewhere you leave behind. Going back home (to the Northern Mariana Islands) was comforting. I was surrounded by my family and old friends, back in the place where my story began. I had a great summer, and being home definitely hit differently. But even while I was there, I kept finding myself thinking about Oberlin, the days in the library, brunches at Stevenson Hall, team dinners, conversations with friends, and the intellectual conversations with professors and peers who constantly pushed me to think harder and become better.
I think once you build an attachment to a place and the people within it, it becomes surprisingly difficult to let go, even for a few months. I missed Oberlin in a way I didn't expect. I missed the people, the routines, the struggles, and even the pressure. My hometown gave me nostalgia because it was where I came from, but Oberlin had become the place where I was actively becoming someone new. There is something special about being surrounded by people who are constantly pursuing something greater, people expanding their vocabulary, questioning ideas, pushing themselves academically, physically, and personally, and challenging one another to grow.
I found myself wishing I could bring everything I loved about home back to my home in Oberlin. It felt like that strange feeling of wanting everything but getting to keep nothing. I wanted the comfort of my hometown and the growth that came from being away. I wanted my family and old friends while still being surrounded by my teammates, professors, and college friends. Being away made me realize that I didn't have to choose one place over the other. Each place simply holds a different part of who I am.
Oberlin has also taught me that the value of people, experiences, and even hardship is what makes life meaningful. It is easy to break down when things become difficult and say, I can't do this. But the longer you endure, persevere, and continue fighting for what you believe in, the more you discover what you're capable of. You find purpose through pressure. You build character through the moments that challenge you. Maybe that is what it means to become a true Obie, not having everything figured out, but continuing to learn, question, struggle, and grow.
I'm still only a second-year student. I'm still figuring out my character, my identity, and the person I want to become. But Oberlin has already become one of the most influential places in my life. It has become a home away from home, not because it replaced where I came from, but because it gave me somewhere new to grow. Home reminds me where I came from. Oberlin is helping me discover where I can go.
