Oberlin Blogs

Guidelines

May 26, 2014

Ida Hoequist ’14

This is my FIFTIETH blog post! A landmark! (I also graduated this morning, which I guess is a landmark too.) This means I get to be insufferable and give you fifty pieces of unsolicited advice! Gosh I just adore special occasions!

No but seriously, I put some thought into this and I believe in what I've written; these are my guidelines for my own Oberlin life, which I have decided to share with you. Some of them, I learned here. Some are particularly important in this place. Some I struggle with here more than anywhere else. I've chunked them, in no particular order, into some relevant categories.
Feel free to add your own in the comments!

Without further ado:

P R I O R I T I E S
- Your mental, emotional, and physical health come first. That's not selfish, that's wonderful.
- Only do the things you can't not do. You don't have time for anything else.
- Stay away from anything that takes you out of living your moment. This moment. This one, right now.
- Sit down and figure out what's important to you, generally speaking. It's okay if that changes. Just keep track.
- Also be clear on what your priorities are for the coming week, and for the coming day. Be clear on what you're doing and why. (Intentionality is such a thing!)

W O R K
- Do your work outside in the sun whenever possible.
- Know your ideal working environment - study buddies? music? desk? cozy space? - and capitalize on it.
- Choose your classes based on the professor, not on the subject.
- Take on less work than you could.
- Schedule short, regular study breaks. Get up, move, stretch, eat a snack, remember that you are more than just a brain.

P E O P L E
- Your peers are all here because someone believed in their awesome. Train yourself to find and also believe in that awesome.
- Befriend your professors. Befriend your professors! Be friends! With! Your professors!
- Hang out with the people you want to become. I guarantee there are plenty of those here.
- Everyone can grow. Even that jerkface. Treat everyone like they have the potential for growth (because they do!).
- Recognize the humans here for the astronomically beautiful and helpful beings they are. Value no resource higher than these humans. Treat them accordingly.

E N G A G E
- Show up. Be present. Go to everything that interests you and a healthy amount of things you think you'll hate.
- Ask for help when you need it. Professors - and peers - can surprise you with their kindness.
- Say thank you. Every single day. Exercise that gratitude muscle!
- Listen more than you talk. Listening skillfully is one of the most important ways you can engage with the world.
- Teach. Something. Anything. A winter term, an exco. Be a writing associate or a tutor.

B E A H U M A N
- Sleep. Do not do the all-nighter. Do the sleep.
- Check in with yourself daily. What ails your body? Where is your mind? How are your feelings? Stay aware of your needs.
- Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself like you would a best friend. Be your own best friend.
- Create silly things! Write letters, finger paint, jam with friends, cook a meal... don't bother about quality. Quality is so restrictive.
- Seek balance. Extremes can be fun but are never sustainable.

G R O W
- You are changing, whether you mean to or not. Keep an eye on the directions you're changing in.
- Know that growth is nonlinear. You're going to frustrate and embarrass yourself. That's okay; it means you know what you want to be like and can see what you need to improve to get there.
- Be vulnerable. Sit with your pain. Figure out how to deal with your discomfort productively.
- Let your peers politicize you. Get angry. Learn how to channel anger into change.
- There is no such thing as closure.

S M A L L D I F F E R E N C E S
- Don't waste anyone's time, including your own.
- Smile when you pass someone on the sidewalk.
- Stay in touch with anyone and everyone you love.
- Take pictures. They will become so precious to you.
- Go to your friend's recital, play, show, whatever. Because you love them and because it will make you a better person.

C O M M U N I T Y
- Soak up the TGIFs. It is special to have so many Obies in one place, being happy together.
- Get to know the other majors in your department. Go for beers. Have study parties.
- Stay for a winter term or summer or both. Get to know the other Oberlins.
- Find ways to interact regularly with people who are not between the ages of 17 and 22. It will keep you grounded and give you perspective.
- Organize something yourself. Appreciate how hard it is; be proud that you got people together to make something good happen.

B U C K E T L I S T
- Go to West Side Market.
- See the Cleveland orchestra play in Finney.
- Join OSCA.
- Swim in the arb. Skinny dip at night if you can.
- Go to some kind of social dance. Contra, blues, swing, or whatever else.
- Do art rental.
- Spend time in the Allen.
- Take your fave profs to professor beers. Or the Feve. Or both.
- Go to at least one a cappella study break.
- Walk in the streets in the middle of the night. It's some kind of magic.

Similar Blog Entries

Love Is in the Air...

February 14, 2025

Ozzie Frazier

The thing is, I don’t care. Well, that’s not true. I do care a lot about love—just maybe not in the traditional sense.

Ozzie Frazier