Get ready to be blockbusted! Last summer’s slate of summer movies was, well, less than great. Yes, we got the spectacular 40-Year-Old Virgin around August but the big movies like Revenge of the Sith and Batman Begins, while passable, were hardly the in the same league as previous summer fare like Spider-Man 2 or Dodgeball.

But now it’s time to make the big money! No more tutti-frutti dramas about gay cowboys, but the good stuff: sequels, remakes and adaptations! Hollywood may be creatively bankrupt, but it’s still rich in entertainment! Right?

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Mission: Impossible 3 – May 5

First Mission: Impossible: good. The vault scene is now a classic and Brian De Palma as a director doesn’t hurt either. While the plot is a little inscrutable, repeat viewings show that it’s fairly easy to follow.

Second Mission: Impossible: not so good. The kryptonite of the West continued to bring pain down upon John Woo and he gave us a long-haired Tom Cruise battling Dougray Scott on motorcycles. Whoop-dee-doo. Oh, I also like how every twist in the film involves the use of a mask and voice changer. Very creative. There’s supposed to be a longer director’s cut of the film that helps tie things together, but it looks like we’re not going to see it anytime soon.

So now, six years and some directors (both Fight Club’s David Fincher and Narc’s Joe Carnahan were attached at various points) and actors (Scarlett Johansson, Ricky Gervais, Carrie-Anne Moss) later, Ethan Hunt (Cruise) is back for a third mission. But he’s in good company. While this is Alias/Lost creator J.J. Abrams first feature film, he’s got a strong cast which includes Ving Rhames, Billy Crudup, Carla Gallo (Lizzy from Undeclared), Larry Fishburn, Michelle Monaghan (of the excellent Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang), Jonathan Rhys Meyers (star of the just-hit-DVD-go-out-and-rent-it Match Point), Philip Seymour Hoffman and, most importantly, Shaun of the Dead’s Simon Pegg.

I don’t really care what the plot is. I’m sure it involves an impossible mission of some kind. Then again, even if I wanted to know, the website’s summation of the story is basically “Tom Cruise fights Philip Seymour Hoffman.” Wow, a good guy vs. a bad guy. I don’t expect this to be better than the first film, but I’m hoping it’s better than the second one.

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Poseidon – May 12

Director Wolfgang Petersen must really enjoy watching people drown. He directed the world’s best submarine film (Das Boot) and The Perfect Storm and now he’s continuing this grand tradition by remaking 1972’s The Poseidon Adventure. For those that are completely unfamiliar with that film, here’s the quick and dirty rundown: A luxury liner capsizes and people have to try and not die.

The film gets my money because it has Kurt Russell and Andre Braugher, but if those guys aren’t your favorites (you ingrate), then perhaps you’ll enjoy Josh Lucas (Sweet Home Alabama), Emmy Rossum (Phantom of the Opera) or Freddy Rodriguez (Six Feet Under).

Or you can just go to see proof that Richard Dreyfuss is still alive.

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The Da Vinci Code – May 19

If you can cut past all the hype, the zealotry and Tom Hanks’ awful haircut (seriously, who told him to grow it like that?), this could be a pretty good little film. Yes, the super-successful book has spawned many other books and TV programs which prove that Dan Brown’s fictional book is fictional. And while the book itself is nowhere near good enough for the amount of success it has received (it’s basically a better version of his previous book Angels & Demons, and it’s still not that well written), it does have a fun concept at its core and 2004’s National Treasure showed that people are happy to have a little education in their adventure (although really, the only real fact in The DaVinci Code is that Leonardo DaVinci made paintings).

I just hope screenwriter Akiva Goldsman didn’t bone a very easy adaptation and the quality of Ron Howard’s direction is more Apollo 13 than Cinderella Man. But with talented actors like Ian McKellan, Alfred Molina and Paul Bettany on board, I doubt the film will be so bad that it will make the baby Jesus cry.

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X3: The Last Stand – May 26

This movie makes me sad. X2 was such a great movie. It was a sequel that built upon and surpassed its predecessor in every single way. I remember when X2 came out, everyone who saw it had a different favorite part. Some liked Wolverine’s rampage in the mansion; others liked Pyro’s police car smackdown; my personal favorite was Magneto’s escape from prison. And then the film’s ending implied we would get to see the adaptation of the famous Dark Pheonix storyline for the third film.

Then Fox decided to be monumentally stupid and stall with director Bryan Singer’s contract, allowing Warner Brothers to scoop the director up in order to make his dream project of a new Superman movie. Then it looked like the film might be all right with director Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake) coming on board. But then Vaughn dropped out for personal reasons and, of course, one of the worst directors today strolled right in to replace him.

Director Brett Ratner is not a talented man. His claims to fame are the Rush Hour movies, which aren’t successful because of his direction, but because people like the dynamic between Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker. With Ratner on board, the amount of mutants in the film exploded. It seemed like this would be an unfocused mess that wouldn’t deliver the Dark Pheonix Saga alone but 50 other storylines as well.

I would love for this film to be good, but then I remember the Christmas card Ratner sent out last year featuring himself and some of the main cast members of the film. He’s dressed up like Wolverine and looks like he’s ready to do some trick-or-treating. This may be the last stand, but you’ll want to be sitting down for this one.

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Cars – June 9

Pixar has earned blind faith. They could cut the worst trailer in human history, hire the worst voice actors, have the worst film premise and they would still deserve an “It could be pretty good.”

That’s because Pixar is six for six. They’ve never made a bad film. You may like some of their films more than others, but none of them fall below the level of “Great.” So even though I think talking cars should be kept in the realm of Chevron commercials; even though I think Larry the Cable Guy should be kept in the realm of the damned; even though a race car who learns humility seems about as interesting as a lost fish, Pixar’s name is synonymous with excellent films. They always put story first and that’s why no matter how much money the Shreks and the Ice Ages rake in, those films will always look like trash compared to what Pixar produces. I have faith this film will make them seven for seven.

Read next week’s issue for the rest of the countdown.