There are plenty of films I’d recommend everyone go out and buy, but I
realize that most people might want to spend their time and money on social
activities. Still, I can’t help myself from pushing films I like onto
other people, because without a personality or a constitution for alcohol, a
film library is basically all I have to get people to like me.
These are movies that are great to play in the background while you work, and
they have dialogue as catchy as any song. Also, all of these films have a low
likelihood of being reissued in the near future, so don’t worry about
picking up a copy only to have a special edition arrive a few months later. And
so, for the college student who’s low on cash and strapped for time, I
submit these five films (in no particular order) for your consideration.
BASEketball (1998) – 103 minutes, $6.99 at Best
Buy
I’ve never really understood why Trey Parker and Matt Stone don’t
do more acting. What do they do with the other 37 weeks of the year when
they’re not making South Park? They both have excellent comic timing and
Parker can deliver some priceless facial expressions. David Zucker’s
sports spoof manages to make great use of their comedic talents, along with that
of their friend Dian Bachar, who ends up as the butt of many of the jokes. The
film is filled with great random moments, some sharp commentary on today’s
professional sports and completely unapologetic humor. I know I’m not the
only one who finds comedy in putting 50,000 volts through a kid who’s a
post-op transplant patient.
»Choice line: “Wow. The Lord must really have it in for that
little boy.”
Super Troopers (2001) – 103 minutes, $9.99 at Best
Buy
This is a film you need to let sink in before you love it. There are plenty
of jokes that connect the first time you see it, like the opening scene or the
antics of Officer Farva. But watch it a couple more times and you’ll
start to find yourself quoting lines that seemed completely innocuous the first
time around. You will find ways to incorporate the lines, “I just lost a
buck...to myself!” and “The lice hate the sugar” into your
daily lexicon. I’ll admit the first time I saw the film I didn’t
really get what the fuss was about and I can’t really explain what turned
me around. All I know is that I manage to utter, “I am all that is
man” at least twice a week.
»Choice line: “...and that was the second time I got
crabs.”
The Big Lebowski (1998) – 117 minutes, $14.99 at Best
Buy
It’s the longest and most expensive film on this list and it is worth
every second and every penny. It’s a tale that involves a urine-soaked
carpet, bowling, kidnapping, a marmet, vaginal artwork, a cowboy and a nihilist
to name just a few. It’s part western, part mystery, all comedy and all
Coen Brothers. It may not have Fargo’s awards or O Brother,
Where Art Thou’s soundtrack, but it has Jeff Bridges and John Goodman
giving the best performances of their careers and a story which seems to be a
constant parody and yet feels completely original. I won’t even describe
the wonder that is Jesus Quintana. Much like Super Troopers, it’s a
film that gets better and funnier with each viewing.
»Choice line: “I’m the Dude. So that’s what you call
me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or, uh, Duder, or El Duderino if
you’re not into the whole brevity thing.”
Dirty Work (1998) – 81 minutes, $9.99 at Best Buy
Alongside the meaning of life and when will Keith Richards die (if ever), one
of the greatest questions in the universe is why Norm McDonald doesn’t
have a bigger career. Surely there’s a market for his unique brand of
comedy. How did Rob Schneider yield films like The Animal, The Hot
Chick and two Deuce Bigalows while Norm McDonald is reduced to cameos
and failed sitcoms? Well, in this film about a revenge-for-hire business, the
potential of Norm is unlocked, Chevy Chase is funny for the first time in years
and it’s all under the direction of Bob Saget (I was surprised too). See
it, or I’ll have no choice but to unleash my loyal army of prostitutes.
»Choice line: “Note to self: No matter how hard life gets, there
is always beer.”
National Lampoon’s Van Wilder (2002) – 94
minutes, $9.99 at Best Buy
There’s this Ryan Reynolds guy that seems to be popping up in a lot of
films lately. If you’ve ever wondered who this guy is and why you should
care, this film is your answer. He’s this mystical blend of Jason Lee, Jim
Carrey and Chevy Chase (when he was funny). Don’t let the National Lampoon
brand scare you; this film does not shame Animal House but honors it.
Don’t let Tara Reid in a leading role scare you; she’s just a plot
device and Reynolds carries her performance. But if you want something to scare
you, then think of the funniest gross-out gag you’ve ever seen in a film.
There’s a scene in this film that completely destroys all pretenders.
»Choice line: “I know Ms. Pac-Man is special. She’s fun.
She’s cute. She swallows.”