By Nile Rice-Mitchell

Staff Writer

 

You may recognize Aaron Walker as “that guy” who appears to have just landed his time-traveling flagship in modern-day Bumblefuck, Ohio. To clarify, he shares an uncanny resemblance to an officer of the 19th century Royal Navy. I had the pleasure of interviewing Admiral Walker on what he hopes will become an Oberlin tradition as infamous as Safer Sex Night, though a bit more refined (and with a little more clothing). This Friday the 15, The Royal Naval Banquet, Song-session & Ball will make its debut in Wilder Hall.

The entire festivity is founded on one principle: “The Golden Triangle.”  Inspired by mathematics’ golden rectangle, the three corners of this triangular foundation block are “good food and drink, good singing, and good dancing.”  

“When you’re proposing an idea,” the Admiral explained, “you’ve got to come up with new terminology.”  Hence the creation of “The Golden Triangle.”

Every aspect of the dinner, dance, and song is period to the 1800s. Partygoers may sit down and enjoy a full meal (6-7pm) – leg of lamb and lobscouse (vegetable stew), to name some of the dishes – or just dance and get down with some spotted dick. Of course, I’m referring to the delicious English dessert (unless you’re game for a few STDs). The catered dinner itself, which includes dessert and drinks, costs $8 per guest, and you must have signed up with the Admiral at least four days in advance.

If you’d rather skip the banquet to sing (7-8pm) and enjoy desserts and drinks (such as wassail – a hot mulled cider – or fine wines), it’ll cost you $3-$5 at the door. Those of you who are at 21 or over will have to fork over those two extra bucks to enjoy fruits of your age. The dinner and dessert menus will feature vegan alternatives. If you’re feeling stingy, you can always come to the English Contra dance 8-11pm for free.

If you really want to get into the spirit of the event, (as you should) costumes will be available in Wilder Lounge on the 14th 1-5pm and the 15th 9am-6pm. Vampires and bomb squad members beware: you’ll be paying a hefty dry-cleaning fee if you fuck up your rental.

“You can get anything you want from Oberlin Gilbert & Sullivan’s costume closet and wear it,” he said, “It’s only $2; you sign a contract, and if it’s blown up or if you get it covered in blood, it’ll cost a little more than $2.”  

 “If you want a costume, it’s two bucks. Now do you have to wear a costume?  No,” he said.

“Should you dress up as a pirate?” his eyes narrowed menacingly, “Never.”

Incidentally, being a pirate in the early 1800s wasn’t a “lucrative” profession. Piracy simply wasn’t a popular career choice of the times.

“The thing I want to make clear   — perfectly clear,” he said, “in the early to mid 18th century…” he paused seriously, “…pirates wore exactly what everybody else wore.”  Needless to say, I was crestfallen.

“And you know it’s wonderful, that vision, that romantic absurdity of pirates,” Walker added, “but when you really dig down to it, they were exactly like any other person to sail the sea at that time.”  I know. What a bummer.

Putting this sad news from my mind, I asked Admiral Walker what had inspired him to organize the banquet. To the best of my understanding, things really kicked off with his Royal Navy ExCo course last year. A few class members and he decided that they could only truly understand and appreciate life at sea in the 1800s by emulating it as accurately as possible. They threw small banquets every two weeks or so and role-played.

“We tried to kind of recreate how one administrates a ship,” the Admiral explained, “it wasn’t so much, you know, ‘critical hit! Pwned!  I am so much more l33t than you!’” I lolled. He continued.

 “It was for the purpose of trying to put yourself in the role, trying to understand. Also, the conversation — we read a lot of period literature to be able to access that world and try to immerse ourselves,” he said.

“We cooked fabulous dinners from period sources. We sang songs during the course of our role-playing sessions,” he said, further describing the revelry.

“The music combined with the food created inspiration, but we thought, ‘You know, I’d love to do this with more people.’” That’s what the Royal Naval Banquet is all about.

As a side note, a number of these fellow students (among others) took part in organizing the banquet and dance. They became Admiral Walker’s private cabinet, an elusive group known only as The Board of the Admiralty.

“We committed each ourselves a certain amount of money, and we also all have a share in convincing each hall council, organizing a few details, trying to divide up the tremendous work in publication that has to happen. In order to effectively communicate a new idea, you need people to just bounce an idea off and see what they have to say, you know, so you can shape your proposal,” he said.

Most importantly, the Admiral hopes that The Royal Naval Banquet, Song-session, & Ball will be an enjoyable cultural learning experience for all who attend.

“I am going to litter the entire place with note cards: every dish that you’re going to eat, there is going to be a note card anywhere you can get,” he said.

“If you pick one up, it will tell you a little bit about each dish, each custom. I mean, it’s one thing to read something, it’s another thing to experience it. You don’t need to go into a classroom to learn, everyone knows this,” he said.  

Walker hopes that going through the motions of a time gone by will immerse attendees in this historical period and its culture. If all goes well, there will be something about this celebration “that will inspire you to learn about it, or inspire you to value it.”

This year marks the premiere of The Royal Naval Banquet, which makes it a “test run.”  If all goes well, we can look forward to a new Oberlin custom.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please enjoy yourselves. Please drink responsibly during the course of the event, that’s all I’m saying,” he advised.

“I don’t see this as a keg party, this is not the occasion. We’re warm, we’re singing, we’re enjoying ourselves. It’s quality over quantity,” he added, “and uh, this is not the ninja versus pirate special meal. You come as a ninja, we’re kicking you out.”  

So all you ninjas, Captain Hooks, and alcoholic frat boys will have to find something else to do on your Friday night. The rest of you just may want to go pay the Admiral a visit.