If you’ve ever seen juniors Andrew Crosby and Vance Murphy apart, good on ya mate. The dual sport athletes have been friends since the JB era and can be seen tearing it up on the football and lacrosse fields. They also team up for one hell of a “Fraggle Rock” rendition.

Crosby, do you think you fit the stereotype of someone from Texas?
AC: Nope. Not at all. Nobody likes Texans. People say, “Oh, you’re from Texas. You don’t seem like you’re from Texas. I like you.”

Do you have a brand on your ass?
AC: I don’t. Thank goodness. People who choose to partake in that I do not favor highly because of their decisions.
VBM: Such as some people on our team.
AC: Brandings, nipple piercing and “The Inventor.”

You’re the reason Vance is playing lacrosse.
AC: Oh yeah.
VBM: Indeed. The lacrosse dudes are cool so I just decided to be cool.

How’s it going so far?
AC: He wasn’t going to play. He was going to wuss out for a long time. He was scared to tell his dad he was going to play.
VBM: You gotta meet my dad.

How did it go when you told him?
VBM: Pretty well. I’m still alive.

Who is bigger?
VBM: He’s much bigger.

Crosby, is he learning quickly?
AC: He’s awesome. He finally learned that he’s faster than everyone out there and stronger than anyone out there.

I’ve heard rumors about a wooden stick.
VBM: Every new player gets a stick and shaft but I broke mine the first day I used it. The shaft isn’t broken in half but it’s pretty well dented.

Is that from you hitting people or people hitting you?
VBM: Probably from people hitting me.
AC: Yeah, but that’s not what you say in the interview!
VBM: So instead of buying me a new one coach gave me a wooden one.
AC: It’s heavier, which is less of an advantage if you’re trying to play quick, but he’s not trying to play quick. The heavier weight lets him smack people. Suckers.

Vance, what’s your full name?
VBMII: Vance Burgess Murphy the Second.

Couldn’t you just be Vance Burgess Murphy, Junior?
VBMII: No, my birth certificate says the second.

But you could be Junior?
VBMII: No, my birth certificate says the second.

Why are you adamant about being the second?
VBMII: Because Junior sounds [sissy]. I can always remember that neighbor guy saying, “Why don’t you just send Junior over.” No. My name’s Vance and I’m the second.
AC: Do people call you Junior?
VBMII: Yeah, and I hate it.

Do people ever call you number two?
#2: Yeah, that’s cool. But the people who call me Junior were the ones who couldn’t remember my name was Vance and would call me Vince or Lance.

You had your first game this past weekend. How was that?
AC: It was good. We were playing at Gettysburg and it was awesome. We took a Gettysburg bus tour. We showed up on the battlefield and this guy got on the bus with us.
#2: Huge mustache.
AC: Yeah, huge pushbrim mustache. He was so excited about Gettysburg and the whole team got into it. You figure we were about the ages of those guys.

You both play the guitar, how is that going?
AC: We are going to put on a show two weekends from now. The 19th I believe.

Where should your groupies go to see the show?
#2: Do we have groupies?
AC: Hopefully at Neumeier’s house.

Is this the Mason Turville Experience [see ITLR 10/1/04]?
AC: Slightly different.

You’ve moved on?
AC: The Mason Turville is still alive. We haven’t practiced in a long time. It’s...
#2: Dormant.
AC: Dormant describes it well.

Should fans be worried that you’re breaking up?
AC: No. Mason Turville is eternal. Long-lasting. Four football players. It’s a bond that can’t be broken. The Mason Turville needs to play more.

Have you ever played?
AC: Yeah. Well, it started during our skit night at the end of football. It was our debut and final show. It was sick. It was the greatest performance that team has ever seen. We always want to get back together.

Is Mason actually in the band?
AC: He plays the shaker which is a Coca-Cola can filled with little rocks with duct tape all around it.

How long has he been playing the shaker for?
AC: I’d say a long time.
#2: His entire life.
AC: Born to play.
#2: Born to shake.
AC: The shaker sports our band logo which is MTE and there may or may not be a lightning bolt.

But the Mason Turville is not the 19th.
AC: No. The 19th is, hopefully, and we haven’t practiced yet—Vance, myself, Will Jaffee on electric lead guitar, Steven Barnes on bass and Nick D someone on drums. He hasn’t had his drums here so we’ve had to push back the show and push back the show and finally we’re going to get it done. It’s going to be a happy-go-lucky thing.

What sort of music are you going to play?
#2: Rap.
AC: No, techno.
#2: Mostly techno.
AC: We’ve got a mix of Dylan, CCR, Tom Petty and some originals.

Any last thoughts?
AC: Ask him what he wore to Safer Sex Night last year.
#2: I don’t know if anyone saw me sporting my bear. I got two teddy bears, ripped them apart and created my own...tunic?