Adolescence:
Change and Continuity
Adolescence:
Change and Continuity
Kimberly Brown kbb109@email.psu.edu
What are the differences in male and female adolscents in academic and social situations?
With the rising divorce rate it is important to look at how divorce affects adolescents in these situations. In terms of academics both boys and girls are more inferior than that of nondivorced children in school performance. There is also a lower number of these children who go on to higher education. One difference that is found between boys and girls form divorced families is that boys of divorced parents are found to have the most behavioral problems (e.g., aggressiveness, impulsivity). These poorer skills prior to the divorce lead to decresed school performance. Also the dropout rate for boys from divorced families is higher than that of girls in the same situation (Forehand, 1991). Not only are there academic effects of divorce but also social. These effects were reported to be similiar in many cases. Some of them are having more responsibility at home (e.g., baby-sitting, household chores, etc.) causing them to spend less time with friends and going to social events. Many teens experience anger and frustration toward the parents for this reason. These as well as other things lead to depression which is frequently found in teens form divorced families. One difference in social adjustment after divorce in girls is that they become more sexually active at a younger age (Avo, 1992).
How does divorce affect the child's present and future relationships?
How can the affects of divorce be strengthened or weakened?
For Further Reading . . .
Basic Books, Inc.
Helpful Websites . . .
Shirley Bishop sab198@psu.edu
The idea that divorce is the cause of a variety of problems in youth is widely held both in the public and in the professional domain (Emery, 1982). There is no lack of literature on the consequences of marital disruption and most of it provides substantial evidence that almost all adolescents experience some degree of trauma when their parents separate. However, teenagers exhibit marked individual differences in their reactions and adjustment to divorce that a very real question of interest to researchers and divorcing parents is: What protective or mediating factors (ie., 'buffers') can be traced to differences among individual adolescents? (Feldman & Elliot, 1990). Below are listed some of the buffers which have been shown to help ameliorate negative consequences of divorce for adolescents:
While I agree that almost all studies suggest that divorce is a critical event for adolescents, it still remains unclear if all effects of the separation are negative or how much it shapes the adolescent's subsequent life course. It is comforting, however, for parents to know there are things they can do to lessen whatever negative effects may follow divorce. In summary, divorcing parents may find it helpful to remember that with teenagers the basics are what count: time and attention, lots of love, peace and consistency between parents, and freedom from poverty. It is also important to remember that although the passage of time is not a guaranteed cure for all problems, most youth experience things getting better as time goes on (Brehm, S., 1992).
References:
Divorce buffers helpful links
getting your children through this http://www.divorceinfo.com/adultchildren.htm
Hints for divorcing parents. -Jeanine Wade, PhD http://www.realtime.net/~mmjw/jw.htm
Adolescent reactions and parent remedies to divorce: A guide to understand basic divorce information which educates prior to seeking professional help http://www.divorcesource.com/info/children/adolescence.shtml
Erin Harmer elh113@psu.edu
In today's society, one out of two marriages end in divorce (Hetherington, 1992). Over sixty percent of these couples seeking a divorce have children living within their homes (Blades, Gosse, Rogus, & Rogers, 1990). Through this disruption of the family, the children are affected in several aspects of their lives. In adolescents, the apparent changes occur predominantly in their behavior.
During adolescence, the teen's feelings are inconsistent. They fluctuate between perceiving themselves as all-knowing to helpless (Francke, 1983). When divorce becomes an issue for the teen, it magnifies these feelings of confusion. This uneasiness can lead the confused teen to act out (Francke, 1983). Boys and girls going through divorce experience several different behavioral changes. The following information is contains signs of behavior differences that may be present in the adolescent.
Boys:
Girls:
Why do adolescents have these behavior problems?
Most children affected by divorce show behavioral troubles prior to the actual divorce (Furstenberg, 1991). The divorce enhances these previous behavioral problems. The temperament of teens and the stressful family factors the teens experience are other factors that affect how the adolescents will deal with the divorce (Furstenberg, 1989). Teens with difficult temperaments act differently compared to teens with easy temperaments. As for stressful family factors, each divorce situation differs. Divorces range in difficulty depending upon the issues present and the methods of dealing with these issues. Due to these different situations, adolescents may feel negativity towards the entire situation and those involved.
References:
For further reading:
How divorce affects children: http://www.vix.com/men/mitch/absent2d.html
Jamie Hassinger jah238@psu.edu
Divorce and events related to divorce, including marital conflict and separation, are almost always significantly stressful events in the life of a child. Adolescents experience common reactions associated with parental divorce in the months after the separation. These reactions may involve feelings of sadness, betrayal, anxiety, aggression, anger, and uncooperative behavior. Along with these reactions adolescents may face disruptions in their normal routines, such as lack of concentration in school and abnormal sleep patterns, and a reduction of contact with one parent. In Out of Touch, Greif, the author, addresses issues adolescents may struggle with when experiencing a parental divorce. The following are examples:
Parental-child relationships
The initial stage of the divorce is the most traumatic for the adolescent. Researchers suggest viewing the divorce as a transition over a one-time event. If adolescents and parents have good communication from the beginning, then the relationships (custodial and non-custodial) will remain on the positive side. On the other hand, changing roles of the parents (e.g. returning to work, increasing hours of working time, changing financial status, and differing parental practices) may affect the parent-child relationship in a negative fashion.
Amato (1994) studied mother and father relations to young adults, and the results of his study indicated that a close relationship with the parents influences the young adult's happiness, life satisfaction, distress, and self esteem.
Physical visitation
Parent-child conflict often begins due to the conflicting schedules of the non-custodial parent and that of the adolescent and custodial parent. In addition, it may be frustrating or even impossible for the parent and child to find a common interest, hence reducing quality time spent together.
Telephone contact
Adolescents have good and bad times to receive phone calls. For adolescents, receiving a call at the wrong time may attribute to a short, uneasy conversation. Also, if the adolescents are currently placed in the middle of a divorce, they may be uncommunicative. This may lead to withdrawal from parents in order to cope with the situation
Visitation at another site
A common problem adolescents experience is conflicting schedules that result in hurt emotions. When an adolescent wants the visiting parent to attend an event that would deepen their relationship, and the parent is unable to attend for various reasons, the child is left feeling hurt, lonely, and unloved. The opposing view is also problematic. If the parent insists on being present, the adolescent may view this as being intrusive, consequently causing tension and anger in the relationship.
Dealing with inter parental conflict
When a parent acts as a facilitator of problems, the adolescent is placed in the middle of the divorce. This tends to lead to animosity between the child and parent. A contributing concern is child support. It is easy for the child to gather feelings associated with this issue and use them to base the relationship upon the presence or absence of support.
Differences with parenting
Conflicting impressions of the needs of the adolescent contribute to differences among parenting. When the parents argue about what is right or wrong, these arguments tend to permeate into the relationship with the child. One relationship may be very inappropriate, relaxed, or inconsistent, causing confusion and resentment towards this particular parent. Steinberg (1996) explains adolescents as experiencing a temporal period of disturbance due to changes in parenting and economic status.
Managing these issues may be difficult. While divorce is not a pleasant experience for anyone, parents can do a lot to reduce the negative effects it may have on children. Overall, it is important to communicate clearly, seek professional help if necessary, and manage these issues directly. If these actions are sought, both the parents and the children can have happy, healthy lives.
References
Helpful links
Victoria Vallone vmv105@psu.edu
By the year 2000, stepfamilies will be the most common family type (Rutter, 1994). If this is the case, what will be the fate of our adolescents in this type of environment? Will it be beneficial for growth and development or added stress to an already difficult period? Many parents struggle with the decision of whether to stay in a bad marriage or to get a divorce. What is better for the children? The biggest problems children have are a result of parental conflict whether they are still married, divorced, or remarried (Rutter, 1994). Studies show that adolescents are not doomed for life in stepfamilies. Contrary to myth, stepfamilies have a high rate of success in raising healthy children. Eighty percent of the kids come out fine (Rutter, 1994). They may even benefit from the experience. With proper adjustment, some stepfamilies are healthier than the first marriages ever were. Experts in the field provide solid evidence for this:
There may be initial problems adjusting to stepfamilies, but they are only temporary(Rutter, 1994).
What makes some stepfamilies work better than others?
Overall, the underlying factor influencing success in stepfamilies is the parents' happiness in their new family system. In most cases remarriage increases parental happiness. Adolescents can thrive in a stepfamily despite common belief.
References:
For further reading:
Stephanie Kahler sec142@psu.edu
What is the sleeper effect?
The sleeper effect most often affects daughters of divorced parents. It typically affects them in late adolescence or early adulthood, when the psychosocial crisis of intimacy is being resolved. It is defined as living with an intolerable level of anxiety and fear of betrayal in romantic relationships. They are fearful of issues regarding commitment and love and often do not trust a trustworthy partner. It is considered a sleeper effect of divorce because it is an effect that may not be seen for years after the divorce has taken place. The sleeper effect occurs at a time when older adolescents must make decisions about commitment, sex, and love. When older adolescents experience the sleeper effect, they are connecting anxious feelings about their parent's divorce and anxious feelings toward their own relationship (Wallerstein & Blakeslee, 1989). Many times girls who experience the sleeper effect seem better adjusted socially, emotionally, and academically immediately following the divorce. They encounter the sleeper effect in their late adolescence or early adulthood when they enter their first serious relationship (Wallerstein & Blakeslee, 1989). Adolescent boys generally do not experience the sleeper effect (Wallerstein & Blakeslee, 1989).
The outcomes of the sleeper effect often include:
References:
Helpful links
Boyfriends as substitute for father's love? This was written by Gayle Peterson, Ph.D. MSSW and is contained in the site ParentsPlace.Com. She is a family therapist specializing in divorce issues and I think this she gives excellent advice. http://www.parentsplace.com/expert/family/divorce/qa/0,3488,11431,00.html
http://parentingteens.about.com/home/parenting/parentingteens/msub14.htm
http://www.parentsplace.com/expert/family/
Michelle Segui mhs119@psu.edu
My cousin Melissa is currently sixteen years old and a junior in high school. I would like to share her situation with you in the hopes that it may be able to give you some insight on teen rebellion and how it relates to family dysfunction and divorce.
Melissa's Story
Melissa's parents were never the happy couple. For as long as I can remember, I never saw them displaying any sort of affection towards one another. In fact, they seemed more like two people who truly disliked each other. They were always fighting with each other inside of their home and Melissa, an only child, tried desperately to ignore the yelling and nasty words being spoken. Being the only child, she was always the person her mother would run to to complain about her husband and the marriage. As she entered adolescence, the family situation began to worsen. Her mother became very depressed and often times blamed Melissa for the failing marriage. Melissa, as well as her father, was constantly being criticized by her mother for any imperfections around the house. Melissa was an average to slow learner and her mother would remind her, constantly, of how dumb she was. In her earlier years, and up until about high school, Melissa found a way of becoming very resilient. She worked extra hard and actually excelled in school, ignoring her mother's criticism. She became an excellent soccer player and was very involved in her church. As Melissa entered high school, however, the family situation took a turn for the worse and her parents separated. As soon as the separation occurred, Melissa became an entirely different person. She was very isolated and reserved, as opposed to the old outgoing and friendly person everyone was so used to. She quit all of her extra activities and her grades began to drop so low that she found herself repeating half of her classes. She started hanging out with a new crowd of friends who were considered, by most, to be the trouble crowd. Finally, after months of a nasty legal battle, her parents were divorce and her father decided to move across the country to get away from his wife. Melissa's mother constantly told her that her dad was an evil, rotten person and a terrible father. Within a short period of time after the divorce, Melissa took up smoking, drugs and alcohol. She got arrested for driving her mother's car without a permit and her mother found drugs and condoms in her room. She began to dress differently than the other kids in her school. She wore baggy clothes, heavy make-up and her hair was always a different color (from red to purple, to jet black, etc.). Before long, she had earring covering her ears, nipples, navel, and tongue.
At first it seemed as if her parents might have wanted help, although they blamed Melissa for her behavior and did not think it had anything to do with them. Before long, they seemed to lose hope. Her mother didn't care what Melissa did anymore and she wore earplugs to bed each night so she would not wake up when Melissa sneaked out. I remember her saying to me, Well, if the school system hasn't helped her by now, I give up! There were no rules or curfews in the house and Melissa's mom left her home for extended periods of time when she began to date again. Melissa was no longer allowed to attend her high school because she got caught with drugs and she currently attends a school for problem children. Her mother doesn't seem to care about anything anymore and Melissa seems very depressed all the time.
Analysis and advice for parents:
There are many reasons as to why Melissa has chosen to rebel. As an only child, Melissa's mother has over involved her in personal, marital matters. This is called triangulation and has been defined by some as the basic problem in emotional disturbance. Basically this occurs when two parents are emotionally estranged from one another, and in their terrible aloneness they over involve their children in their emotional distress(Napier, Whitaker, 1978) Often times this over involving of the child can contribute to the rebellious behavior of the adolescent.
Melissa's family situation is not, by any means, unique in today's society. Over one million children experience the divorce of their parents each year (CDF,1997). Divorce adds to the stress that an adolescent already faces, making normal development harder on the child. In order for the divorce to be easier on the child, there are certain things a parent should examine and be aware of:
How to tell if your teen needs help:
Many parents, as in Melissa's case, wait too long before deciding to seek help. Melissa was calling out for attention in a home where her parents were so busy with their own problems that they did not take notice, right away, to her abnormal behaviors. Below is a list of signs that should warn a parent of abnormal behaviors in order to seek help.
It is important for parents to be aware of these serious behaviors. In Melissa's case, the sneaking out, drug and alcohol abuse, sexual promiscuity, law violation, and school failure were all concrete signs of problems that needed her parents' attention.
Parenting styles in relation to troubled teens:
Parenting styles also tend to play a part in an adolescents behavior. Melissa's parents were always on the neglectful side because they were so wrapped up in their own problems. When the divorce was at its worst, her parents became very neglectful and her father even left the state. Neglectful parents have both low demandingness and low responsiveness. These parents are uninvolved and uninterested in their children. They set no limits and offer no support. Adolescents with neglectful parents are in most danger of engaging in deviant behavior. Drug and alcohol use is extremely high in adolescents who were raised by neglectful parents (Cole, 1993).
A way to avoid becoming neglectful is to develop good parenting communication. Communication barriers are habits that get in the way of good parenting and should be avoided. These include:
For additional information:
The following web sites are also helpful:
Tara Nearhood ten109@psu.edu
Until Death do us part,” is becoming a vow of the past. Between the 1960’s and the 1980’s the rate of divorce has astonishingly tripled. It has been noted that fifty percent of the marriages that take place on a given day will terminate as the result of divorce. Through this trend, single parent households have become more prevalent in our society. Specifically, this has had a profound effect on the number of female-headed households in the United States. Statistically, more than 86% of women receives custody of children in divorce situations. In accordance to the United States Census Bureau, females head more than 12 million households. Also, at any given time, 1:4 school age children are living in single parent households.
Although earlier research has indicated profound negative effects on children growing up in single parent households, the recent divorce trend has allowed these theories to be retested and disproved. In earlier times, one can see the portrayal of the intact family as the “normal” family. Consistent with this ideal was a bread-winning father, stay at home mother, and a few kids. It was this “white picket fence” mentality that led researchers to exemplify the negative effects of divorce on children and downplay the positive effects. Recently however, divorce is theorized to cause a temporary shift in the family system. When equilibrium is achieved in roughly two years, the family system and even the children are said to return to normal.
One of the most researched areas of divorce is the effect on children and school achievement. Initially, the rate of drop out correlated strongly with those who grew up in single family homes. Most recently however, it is found that this strong correlation is due to the poverty that single parents must deal with after a divorce. Consistent with this idea is that single parent homes are often in more impoverished neighborhoods than intact families. In these neighborhoods, academics are not as greatly valued; thus the drop out rate is higher. Research has indicated that school achievement is affected but with the return to the equilibrium, achievement is said to attain stability. Rather than attributing negative school achievement to divorce, we must attribute it to the change in the family system. In conjunction with this notion is the indication that children who grow up in single parent households where only one parent has ever been present have similar achievement patterns as a child from an intact family. Eventually, it has been proven that children who succeed in academics are more likely to achieve greater success than their counter partners from intact families(Boyd, Parrish and Lewis, 1985).
It was once theorized that the rate of depression, hostility and mistrust were more consistent among children following divorce. However, based on research, children from divorced homes have greater maturity, autonomy and are more helpful than those from the nuclear family (Amato 1986).
Longitudinal research has also indicated that children who suffer from serious problems following divorce most likely had the same problem prior to the change in the family structure. Much of the research indicates that children report more happiness in a household with a happy family system, rather than one of conflict. Based on this, one can conclude that the long term effects of divorce greatly outweigh those of children growing up in conflictual environments(Walerstein and Corbin 1989). Rather than solely placing blame on divorce for causing problems, we must examine the external factor of poverty as a greater problem in divorce situations.
REFERENCES
This site was produced by students taking HDFS 433: The Transition to Adulthood and HDFS 239: Adolescent Development at the Pennsylvania State University. Feedback can be sent to the individual authors or to Nancy Darling (darling@bard.edu).
Last updated 4/16/01.